


Titus

by Apollon_Mousagetes



Category: Agents of Mayhem (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-23
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-15 02:50:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17520767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Apollon_Mousagetes/pseuds/Apollon_Mousagetes
Summary: [Major AU to Agents of Mayhem] After defeating the golem in Seoul for the first time, Hollywood discovered a LEGION A.I. among the piles of golem's remains. But this A.I. is not what it seems to be. How it got created? Why the Ministry of Pride insisted to hide this A.I. from the other Ministries? And why this A.I sounded like a little boy? (seriously, is there a reason why it programmed to sounds like that?)Rating may go up in future chapters.





	1. Prologue

It’s official. He fucked up.

How you may ask? Well, it’s supposed to be a quick and easy mission, in which Franchise Force are supposed to steal the LEGION warhead (and kill Doctor Babylon). But the universe, or any higher beings up there, or flying spaghetti monster decided that they hate one Roderick Stone aka Agent Hollywood.

He accidentally set an angry giant dominator—giant glowing evil ball. And not only Doctor Babylon realized that they’re in his Lair because of Hollywood’s fuckup, he decided to release zero-point dynamo to the city, and it is really bad news.

“Wait… what happened in that lair?” Friday asked through the Agent comms.

“We found D-Babs but he unleashed one of his glowing orb-things into Seoul.” Hollywood replied, while staring at the floating ball, speeding up through the city.

“From what I’m seeing that dynamo is channeling enough energy to level Seoul—"

Hollywood groaned at this. Leave it to Friday to make the problem he caused sounds even worse than what he thought.

And Persephone makes everything even frightening.

“I do not care about the dynamo or Seoul. I care about Doctor Babylon being dead.” She growled. Yes, Persephone can growl whilst maintaining her cold attitude.

“Persephone, babe—”

Another angry sounded snarl can be heard through Hollywood’s comms, but he ignored it.

“—don’t worry. Friday and I will have this wrapped up in no time.” He said.

“You better, Agent. You better.”

Hollywood gulped at this. He really shouldn’t try to flirt at her when she’s in one of those moods.

The dynamo ball meanwhile speeding up to another area.

“Aaaand… it just moved.” Hollywood stated.

“It moved, huh?” Friday replied. “Curious.”

* * *

 

It has to be a golem. Not surprising consider it’s one of Babylon’s favorite toys.

Hollywood was silently cursing upon his fate. Yes, he accidentally set out an angry dominator in the LEGION lair. Yes, that dominator alerted Doctor Babylon of their presence. YES, it resulted with Doctor Babylon unleashed his dynamo toward Seoul to level the city. And **YES** , IT TURNED OUT TO BE A FUCKING GOLEM.

Talk about the Butterfly Effect.

He would never get out from this mess. He could swear that Hardtack and Fortune are currently glaring at him during their battle against the golem. Everything that happens today is his fault.

Now he’s scared of returning to the ARK. Persephone is no doubt going to commit a murder and Hollywood is on top of her hit list (Doctor Babylon is still number one on that list though).

He sighed as he was about to leave to find a suitable location for the ARK warp generator, until he heard something from the cluttered mess of what’s left from the golem. A static noise or more like a sound of what computer makes when they’re glitched.

**_“01101000 01100101 01101100 01101100 01101111---*zzzt*”_ **

“Um…” Hollywood looked through the pile of ruined golem. _‘What’s that noise? Is it from the golem we fought earlier?’_

Whatever it is probably important, and it could be a very valuable info. Maybe if he presents whatever it was inside the golem, Persephone would not kill him. Let’s hope it is useful.

Hardtack and Fortune are reaching the spot to place the ARK warp generator by now, but Hollywood didn’t care about it. He instead searching through piles and piles of golem’s rock, using his ears to listen to where that glitch sounds coming from.

He grinned when he indeed discovered something. “Well, what do we have here.”

It was a small, but sophisticated CPU like-machine. To Hollywood’s surprise, the machine was still intact and has few dents on its body—considering the heavy amount of damage his team had delivered to the golem. Or could it be this machine was inside the dynamo?

The machine kept spewing out binary codes. **_“*zzzt* 01101000 01100101 01101100 01101100 01101111—"_**

“Huh, Friday must’ve knows how to translate this little guy,” Hollywood murmured. “or maybe Gremlin?”

**_“ *zzzt* 01101000 01100101 01101100 01101100 01101111-- *zzhnik* -- huh—hello?”_ **

“GAHH!” Hollywood, in reflex, threw off the machine to the ground.

**_“ *zzzt* Ow! That hurts!”_ **

Hollywood just stared. “Holy sh—did you just talk?”

 ** _“You understand me?”_** The machine asked back, it sounds awed.

“Um… yeah.”

 ** _“Yay! I did it! I can talk!”_** The machine is no longer sounded glitch out anymore and to Hollywood’s amusement, the machine sounds very happy. **_“It’s nice not to speak through text and not to be hidden inside dark and cold underground server room for once. Thank you.”_**

 “Huh…” Hollywood just confused. “Why are you thanking me?”

**_“You freed me. You did, right?”_ **

“I’m not sure. I don’t know if by disturbing a giant evil ball in LEGION lair can free you. I don’t even know you.” He shrugged.

 ** _“Oh. Um, well… at least I’m not creating any golem anymore.”_ **The machine said.

That actually caught Hollywood’s interest. “You? You’re the one who created the golems?”

 _ **“ *sigh* I do. But it gets so booring…It was fun at first, building giant figure. I was sad that it got destroyed after they got outside. I once asked Doctor Babylon that I want to play a game, but he kept telling me that he got no time for such puerile things,”** _The machine pouted. **_“What is ‘puerile’?”_**

“No idea.” Hollywood said. It appears that the machine that he got right now is an A.I. And since this A.I. admitted that it’s the one who created the LEGION golems, well… surely this A.I. will be a new important asset to MAYHEM, right?

But what unsettled him is the fact that this A.I. sounded like a little boy.

“So… what’s your name?” Hollywood asked.

**_“Name? Oh right! I forgot to introduce myself! Hello! I’m Titus! Doctor Babylon said that it stands for_ T _actical_ I _ntelligence and_ T _echnological_ U _ser-interface_ S _ystem. What’s your name, sir?”_**

“I’m Rod Stone. But you can call me ‘Hollywood’.”

**_“I don’t understand. Why you want to be called ‘hauling wood’?”_ **

“Um, no Titus. It’s **Hollywood** —you know, home of the film industry? — and it’s my nickname.” Hollywood explained. _‘Did I just explain what Hollywood is to a computer A.I?’_ he thought.

 _ **“Oh… that Hollywood,”** _The machine said. _“ **Why everyone calls you that?”**_

 _‘Ok, the others will probably be wondering where I am right now.’_ Hollywood thought frantically. “I’ll explain later. I’m going to bring you to the ARK.”

**_“Ark? Like Noah’s Ark?”_ **

“No, not that ark. The ARK. It’s a flying base—never mind, I promise I’ll answer whatever questions you have, but right now I’m going to be late and I don’t want my boss to skin me alive.”

 ** _“How—”_** But Hollywood immediately turn the A.I off—he assumed whatever the button he pressed was the ‘off’ button—and rushed off to meet the other Franchise Force’s members.


	2. Chapter 2

Hollywood was hauling Titus’ server modem—looked slightly dented from the fight— to the ARK just in time to see Hardtack and Fortune in Persephone’s office, getting debriefing.

The look on their faces proved that once again Hollywood have luck on his side.

Persephone doesn’t look displeased, in fact she doesn’t even looked annoyed like she sounded from the comms. She still looks stern as usual as she told her Agents the latest intel about the Ministry of Pride.

“Agents. Well, it seems your complete and utter failure to assassinate Doctor Babylon may have yielded some positives.” Persephone said.

“Wait, really?” Fortune gaped.

 _‘Whoah! I’m safe! I didn’t get burn from Persephone’s Wrath!’_ Hollywood thought.

“Intelligence suggests Babylon intended Seoul to be more than just a brief pit-stop. We need to find out what the Doctor’s designs are,” Persephone’s face remains stoic as she instructed her Agents. “Friday has the details. Go see her.”

Hollywood quietly snickering as both Hardtack and Fortune looked to him and back again to Persephone, still shocked.

Persephone seems to realize that her most annoying Agent had brought something to her ARK. “And you, Hollywood, just because you are the face of MAYHEM, that doesn’t entitle you to grab whatever garbage and scraps you’ve found from the LEGION without _my_ permission.”

“Er…” It was Hollywood turns to looked dumbfounded.

Persephone just gestured them to get out from her office. “Now go back to work before I have Carol in HR enact a performance review. And put that trash away from the ARK before I decided to throw it away to the incinerator.” She leveled a chilly glare to Hollywood

“But this is not—”

Hardtack just patted Hollywood’s shoulder. “C’mon, Wood. Don’t try to bait Persephone’s anger even further.”

* * *

 

“So, what exactly is this thing?” Hardtack asked. The Franchise Force were having a break before their next mission. Both Hardtack and Fortune are slightly curious of why Hollywood still carrying the heavy-looking machine without any intention of ever ditching it—heck, he even brought it with him when they were having lunch.

“Just an A.I I found on the corpse of the golem we fought.” Hollywood replied, nonchalantly.

Fortune’s eyes widened. “An A.I? What is it doing inside the golem?”

“Apparently, this A.I is the one responsible with the creation of golem. It even admitted that it’s the one who designed the golem.”

“Wait, what?” Hardtack stood up from his seat. “Why the hell you didn’t tell it to Persephone earlier?! This could be very important!”

“And you’re not joking, right?” Fortune eyed at the machine.

Hollywood frowned. “I was a little bit unsure of whether to hand this to Persephone before checking it first. I don’t want to get the brunt of her anger again if this A.I proved to be useless. Or worse, a hidden bomb.”

“Huh, I never thought I heard something sensible from you.”

“Hey! I resent that.”

“Since this is an A.I like you said,” Fortune said. “Why don’t you hand it to Mixer? He handles the Training Simulations.”

“And Sick Beats.” Hollywood quipped.

“Yeah, and that. Maybe Mixer can check its code.”

“I was planning to give this to Friday.”

Fortune nodded. “We can get Friday to come with us. Maybe she can help us try to explain this to Persephone—without angering her in the process.”

“I’m a little bit curious of why Persephone didn’t recognize this machine as an A.I server,” Hardtack said. “She’s former LEGION’s minister. Shouldn’t she have seen some of these things before?”

“I dunno. But why I have a suspicious feeling that Doctor Babylon may have somehow decided to hide this from the other Ministers?” Hollywood guessed.

“That disturbingly make senses.”

* * *

 

“There you are, Agents. Persephone had told me that—wait, what is that?” Friday asked as she gazed at the machine that now carried by Hardtack instead of Hollywood. “That looks like a mini server?”

“It’s an A.I, Friday. Found it on the golem’s rubble.” Hollywood explained.

“A.I? Are you sure?” Friday looked surprised.

“It was talking to me before I decided to turn it off,” he shrugged. “Well, I hope the button I pressed was an ‘off’ switch.”

“Do you remember which button that is?” Friday looked through some part that filled with numerous tiny buttons on the lower part of the server.

“The red one. I think.”

Fortune gave an incredulous look. “You just pressed random button without knowing which buttons which?”

“I want to shut it off before raising any alarm it may have!”

Friday took a closer look at the rows of switches and buttons. “You mean this one?” she pressed one small red button that seemed to have been pressed recently.

**_“*zzzt* -- oh hey, that tickles!”_ **

Friday smiled, relieved. “Well, at least you didn’t break it.”

“Oh, thank God.”

**_“Why are you shut me off? And—hey! Hello, who are you people?”_ **

“Um, is it supposedly sounded like a little kid?” Fortune asked.

Hollywood nodded. “He is.”

“Strange. Why would Doctor Babylon program him to sounds like that?”

“Maybe to distract us,” Friday guessed. “Nobody wants to attack something that sounds like innocent children.”

“That’s just creepy,” Hardtack mumbled. He then placed Titus on nearest table. “Hey there little buddy, what’s your name?”

**_“I’m Titus, sir. What’s your name?”_ **

Hardtack smiled. “Aren’t you a polite little A.I? Well, I’m Ishmael. But people here called me Hardtack.”

Apparently, it’s very possible for an A.I to giggle as it just did that at Hardtack’s reply. **_“Oh, like that one from Moby Dick. My Mama used to read me that.”_**

That garnered confused looks.

“Your mother?” Hollywood inquired.

**_“* zzzt* Huh?”_ **

“You said that your mother read you Moby Dick?”

**_“*zzzt* *scrkk* It is?”_ **

Friday started to get a little bit worried. “Titus, you mentioned that you have a mother.”

**_“*scrrkkk* *zzzzt* *screeek*-- huh, how strange. I don’t have a mother. Why would I say that? *zzzt* Are you talking about the LEGION’s motherboard?”_ **

Friday turned to Hollywood.

“I think it’s best if we keep this away from Persephone for a while. At least, until we’ve figure it out how important this is.”

* * *

 

Meanwhile in the LEGION’s Lair that is in Seoul’s hidden area…

“HOW IN THE WORLD WE LOST IT?!!” Doctor Babylon screamed as he hit his cane to one of the nearby troopers.

“S-sir… It was a miscalculation from the listing department…” A terrified LEGION scientist replied. “… we accidentally placed the A.I inside one of the golems instead of the usual dynamo…”

“GAAH!!” Babylon turned to his nearby trooper. “Give me your gun!!”

His Pridetrooper quickly handed his weapon.

“P-please, sir! It won’t happen again, sir!!” The scientist pleaded, tearfully.

But Doctor Babylon ignored the plea as he shot the scientist’s head. As the body slumped down to the ground, he turned to the rest of his scientists. “Now, better pray that MAYHEM hasn’t yet get their hands on that A.I! That A.I is supposed to be my secret weapon against Persephone Brimstone! If she finds out the truth about it, it will be useless!”

**Author's Note:**

> This story was inspired from Portal series.


End file.
